Game reviewers

Okay, so I've just been reading a bunch of game reviews and it seems that so many of the reviewers are really, really dumb. Or wrong, in some way. I'm so unimpressed with the stupidity of these people that I'm going to complain about it here. Okay, here are some of the awful things that I came across.

1) "For fuck's sake, -insert main character's name here- is your typical cliche angsty/moody emo guy". Okay, there are two things wrong with this. First of all, the characters they are reffering to are NOT angsty/moody emo guys. Just because a character isn't super happy doesn't mean they're depressed. A character can be quiet, or shy, or reserved without being angsty or moody, right? Kaim from Lost Odyssey is NOT emo, Cloud from Final Fantasy VII is NOT emo (Advent Children not included). The other problem with people saying this is that the angsty/moody emo guy is hardly cliche. In video games, at least. Let's name all the angsty/moody emo main guys in a JRPG. Okay, Squall from Final Fantasy VIII and... Um... Well....... You see my point?

2) "WTF!!! In this game you can't jump or swing your sword outside of battle" or "WTF!!! In this game there's like a plot and stuff and plots take away from the game" or "WTF!!! There's romance in this game. I'm not a girl, okay? I don't want romance. Eww!" or "WTF!!! The battle system in this game is weird! It's like turn-based and weird and junk". Okay, all I have to say to these kind of people, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU PLAYING AN RPG IF YOU DON'T LIKE RPG-ELEMENTS! GO HOME!!!!

3) "This game is so dumb. The characters get hit with fireballs and swords and they still live. LOLWTF?". *sigh* It's a video game. It's also a fantasy. Fuck off.

4) "Most of the characters in this game were awful. Like the -insert character with internal conflict and more character development than anyone else in the game-. She sucked, eh? Oh, but there was one good character. -Insert comic relief character who is rarely actually funny and usually ends up ruining the mood- was awesome, he was definately the best character in the game. Come on people, didn't we learn our lesson from Xander???